3 Phrases to Avoid (#17 Small Talk 2018)

Things not to say to a new mom 

Sometimes one speaks without thinking and if you are meeting with your best friend who happens to be a new mom you could be left with a foot in your mouth! There are certain things that a new mom definitely doesn’t want to hear. I’ll give you 3 examples of comments to be avoided if at all possible.

1: My, but you’re still so fat!

you're so fat! photo credit: GoFoto Lifestyle Newborn Photography

Unfortunately, a woman’s tummy doesn’t miraculously shrink back to normal size immediately after birth! Nor does the extra weight melt away the minute baby is out! Yes, some lucky women do shed those kilos very quickly and seemingly without much effort. But for those who aren’t so lucky the above comment can be extremely hurtful, so avoid it!

2: Are you sure you’re doing that correctly?

A new mom needs positive encouragement and this kind of question can place a lot of doubt in a new mom’s mind. Rather comment on a positive note or keep silent!

3: Stop worrying

stop worrying photo credit: GoFoto Lifestyle Newborn Photography

This is virtually impossible for a new mom to do! From the moment her baby was born, her mind has probably been filled with concerns about her baby and how she will manage this tiny little human. Again, positive comments are more appropriate – try saying something like “babies are stronger than you think” and “You are going to be a great mom!”

Final thoughts

Be considerate of a new mom’s uncertainties. If you notice her looking rather ragged and tired, instead of commenting on her looks rather offer practical help, like cooking a meal for her or offering to do her weekly shop for the first week or two. Most of us don’t mean to cause hurt with our comments or questions but we have to bear in mind that this is a very sensitive time for a new mom, especially if it is her first child.

Any thoughts or comments would be greatly appreciated! You can email me at lydia@gofotolifestylenewbornphotography.co.za or just use the comment box below this blog



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